Dare to fly higher

I need to change my

Matthew McConaughey – from heartthrob to professor

The arrow doesn’t seek the target, the target draws the arrow.Matthew McConaughey
Yes, I just quoted Matthew McConaughey. And yep, it’s the same stoner from Dazed & Confused, dreamy lead love interest in How to Lose a Guy in Ten Days, Matthew McConaughey you’re picturing. It’s likely you’re wondering, who quotes Matthew McConaughey? Don’t give up on me yet! Earlier this year I read his book, Greenlights. And when I say I read it, I mean I devoured it! Literally couldn’t put it down. (He’s got much more depth than I had ever imagined.)
Why I bring this up here: Matthew (yes, we’re on a first name basis) writes about a transformational time in his life and career in 2008 when he refused work for nearly two years, virtually disappearing from Hollywood. The reason: he knew in his heart, and in his gut, that he was destined for more. Having grown his fame to become one of the world’s most recognized heartthrobs, almost the “you can count on it” leading man in every Rom Com, Matthew longed to be a dramatic actor.
In 2008 he chose to quietly step out of the limelight and into his cocoon so he could re-emerge, spread his wings, and shock everyone with his versatility. Dozens of leading roles for new Rom Coms came to him in those two years. He denied every one of them. Matthew writes, “When facing any crisis…I’ve found that a good plan is to first recognize the problem, then stabilize the situation, organize the response, then respond. Aware that I needed more as an actor, I’d recognized the problem. Now it was time to pivot and stabilize my situation.”
His crisis at that time was his yearning burning desire to be more and do more. About a dozen years later, he transformed yet again, when he realized he was living most abundantly through his characters. For our entertainment, he had brought countless characters to life, and at this juncture of his life he realized it was time for another change. In 2019, Matthew became a professor of practice at UT Austin, his alma mater, as well as the  Minister of Culture for the University of Texas and the City of Austin and several additional non-Hollywood lead roles.
What’s the target drawing your arrow?
October 16, 2021

The transition out of a corporate office, into self employment

Transition is tough sometimes. Transitioning out of an identity you’ve held to then recreate a new identity- that is brutal. It’s not something we should have to face alone; but when going through it, it feels impossible to put into words to even ask for help from someone else.
There’s no class in school or field of study to pursue just to explore the root of our “who”, our sense of Self. Sure, it might come up from time to time in a Psych class, or in a journaling exercise in English class, but for the most part, we’re not taught the skills we need to navigate these types of transitions in a healthy way. Whether it’s retirement after a long career, unexpected early retirement, return from deployment or discharge, divorce, marriage, parenthood… the process of separating that piece of our identity from ourselves feels like peeling off our skin like a comfortable jacket you’ve loved forever to put on a new one that is not yet broken in and doesn’t quite feel right at first.
It can be uncomfortable. It can be isolating. It can be devastating.
But, change is indeed inevitable.
A constant reminder scribbled on a bright pink sticky note on my bathroom mirror reads,
“For a seed to achieve its greatest expression, it must come completely undone. The shell cracks, its insides come out and everything changes. To someone who doesn’t understand growth, it would look like complete destruction.”  Cynthia Occelli.
Sometimes a complete transformation is necessary; and it can look and feel like complete destruction. What I love most about Occelli’s words is the subtle encouragement to strive for achieving our greatest expression. Isn’t that what life should be about? Afterall, who wants to get to the end of their life having only ever lived as a caterpillar?
October 16, 2021